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Profundus

Collecting thoughts can sometimes be an arduous process.

Barb and I have an in-joke about finding hookers in Owatonna. It's become something of an in-phrase for something difficult or impossible-- "it's harder than finding a hooker in Owatonna".

So in a moment of mental ossification, I started looking for a hooker in Owatonna.

First of all, they don't exactly have a section on prostitutes in the yellow pages. I checked. The closest thing they have is an "adult entertainment" section with one entry that is up in Minneapolis for dancers for bachelor parties.

So I figured that a strip club may be the next best thing.

Nope.

The closest one is in Nicollet, which is on the other side of Mankato. It's as far as a drive to the 'Cities would be. I did discover that the owner of (the former) Jakes opened up a new club in Bock, which is halfway to Brainerd. There is one in Cannon Falls, but again it's a fair distance away. There is a topless bar in Albert Lea, but I'm not going 50 miles just to see boobies. I want the full Monte, or the full Minnie as the case may be.

Adult bookstores: nope.

Adult entertainment of any kind: nope.

Apparently Owatonna has an ordinance that prohibits any adult-themed entertainment within a 50-mile radius. Finding any kind of adult entertainment is like... well, it's like finding a hooker in Owatonna.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
jmanna
Jul. 29th, 2003 10:34 am (UTC)
Did you look for 'personal massage parlors'. Heck pop on the internet put in the city and call girls. I mean come on, if you really wanna find them, try harder :D
magicmarmot
Jul. 29th, 2003 03:57 pm (UTC)
All of the massage places in town are either chiropractic or day-spa oriented.
Nice try though.

And if I enter "Owatonna" and "hooker", I get a list of websites on historical veterans.

Really, t'aint nothing here. Or if there is, it's well hidden.
davidkingsley
Jul. 29th, 2003 10:54 am (UTC)
Have you tried the hotel bars?
magicmarmot
Jul. 29th, 2003 03:53 pm (UTC)
Hotels here don't have bars. The Holiday in has a Green Mill, that's close, but the idea of trying to pick up hookers at a Green Mill just seems-- desperate?
eldogo
Jul. 29th, 2003 11:45 am (UTC)
Owatonna is the home of Dick Day, Republican majority leader of the State Senate.

I surprised you can rent an R-rated movie there.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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