Tom Ramcigam (magicmarmot) wrote,
Tom Ramcigam

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Two years ago, I was living out of a hotel room in Des Moines (technically Clive, but it's a 'Burb) and my relationship with Barb was falling apart in a very big way. It was the last "nice" day that we would have.

A year ago, I was hopeful. I was getting out of the Gulag, had some intetresting job possibilities, and had colored my hair.

Today, I'm feeling kind of hopeful. I've pretty much given up on the idea of relationships. I still have taxes to finish, doing some location scouting this weekend, and otherwise just being busy with stuff, but there is some light at the end of the tunnel. Either that, or getting my tooth fixed has had a lot more impact than I had considered.

Heh. Really, if you need a book for this, perhaps you need to get out more.

I think I've more or less come to terms with being romantially unattached. Sure, there are still many nights that I'd really like to be snuggling with someone who isn't furry and communicates mainly through paw gestures, but there's something kind of freeing about being able to make decisions and plans without having to argue and discuss and compromise. It's nice to be able to go somewhere spontaneously, to decide to go see a crappy horror movie because I want to, to bounce out to the strip club if I feel like it, to leave the toilet seat up, or to hang a skeleton in the shower just for the hell of it.

I do envy those whose relationships include things like support and solidity. I find those things admirable. But I think I'm on a track that doesn't really lend itself to having someone in my life that fills that role, other than friends. Maybe I'm the equivalent of the crazy old cat lady (crazy old marmot dude?).

Ehh. I'll probably feel different tomorrow, but right now, right this minute, I'm a cynical kind of chipper.

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