At least I'm not gouging my kidneys out with an icepick.
I'm not actively pursuing any dates anymore, or at least not right now. Between questionable Russian "women" admiring my structure, gender-ambiguous polyglots, a number of coeds somehow stranded in Nigeria, and them looking for a "good provider for her, her babies and a couple of kinfolk", the dating pool looks like it has a whole lot of shallow end.
I think I'm spoiled when it comes to women. I don't think I'm asking for the impossible, but I am asking for extraordinary.
Intelligence. Integrity. Creativity. Strength. Passion. Non-smoking, not insane, reasonably healthy. Decent spelling, use of grammar. Sense of humor. Communication. Likes hot tubs and backrubs.
Swimsuit model a plus.
I suppose there's a lot more if I were to get into it, but that seems to be a good place to start.