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Ganked from loba

There are times in our lives when withdrawing from our social
obligations and taking some time to be alone is necessary to rejuvenate
our energy and renew our connection to ourselves. However, there are
also times when withdrawal is a red flag, indicating an underlying sense
of depression or some other problem. We may not even have consciously
decided to isolate ourselves but wake up one day to find that we have
been spending most of our time alone. Perhaps it's been a long time
since friends who used to call have given up. Without anyone inviting us
out, we sink deeper into alienation.

The longer our isolation lasts, the harder it becomes to reach out to
people. It is as if we have failed to exercise a particular muscle, and
now it is so weak we don't know how to use it. Yet, in order to return
to a healthy, balanced state of being, that's exactly what we need to
do. If you find yourself in this situation, call an understanding friend
who will listen to you with compassion, not a defensive friend who may
have taken your withdrawal personally. The last thing you need is to be
chided; a negative response could intensity your isolation. If you don't
have a kind friend you can rely on, call a spiritual counselor or
therapist. They may be able to help you determine the underlying cause
of your isolation and help you find your way out of it.

When you've been in a pattern of secluding yourself, it can begin to
seem impossible that you could reenter the world of friendships,
conversations, and group activities, but with time, you will. Most
people will understand if you take the time to explain that you've
fallen out of touch and would like to reconnect. Take your time and be
gentle with yourself, starting with one person and building from there.
Try to reach out to one new person every week. Before you know it, you
will find yourself back in the company of friends.

I know why I'm withdrawing, or at least I think I do. And yes, depression is a part of it. But right now I also have a great deal of frustration and anger, and I'm really not very good company.

I pretty much feel broken and bruised. Between the house, the studio, and money issues, my existence is pretty much being run through the mill. And it doesn't look like it will be ending soon.

I do want to be social. Not right now, not until I find make a place where I can be at peace for a while.

I haven't forgotten about you.


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 16th, 2006 06:08 pm (UTC)
I know the feeling...
One thing to remember is that your friends aren't all expecting you to entertain them. You may be feeling "unworthy" as company but don't assume others consider you to be so.

I also understand that we tend to get bored w/ our own bad news most quickly. It gets tiresome to have nothing but negative things to report, whereas it's ALWAYS fun to have good &/or exciting news. That doesn't mean your friends will get tired of you & resent you either- though they might take you out to a movie to cheer you the fuck up. ;-)
Aug. 16th, 2006 06:43 pm (UTC)
Re: I know the feeling...
Mad Blonde is a wise woman. You'd better listen to her, Marmot! ;-)
Aug. 17th, 2006 10:33 pm (UTC)

Gank at will, dear. The Om people always make more. :-)

PS: Since I've been able to unpack a few books, I've been wanting to crawl under the couch for a week or two myself. Soemtiems hermiting is good -- make sure you have your creature comforts, though, ok? No-one ever hibernated in an Iron Maiden, y'know.

*hugs more*
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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