You know, I think I've answered these questions before, but not with two words only.
1. Explain what ended your last relationship? Shaving gel.
2. When was the last time you shaved? October sometime.
3. What were you doing this morning at 8 a.m.? smacking clock.
4. What were you doing 15 minutes ago? combing butt.
5. Are you any good at math? in theory.
6. Your prom night? potato pancake
7. Do you have any famous ancestors? insufficient evidence
8. Have you had to take a loan out for school? I'm screwed.
9. Do you know the words to the song on your myspace profile? uncomfortable sandwich.
10. Last thing received in the mail? random wildlife
11. How many different beverages have you had today? eleventy-six pillows.
12. Do you ever leave messages on people's answering machine? random images
13. Who did you lose your CONCERT virginity to? Stripper Elaine
14. Do you draw your name in the sand when you go to the beach? yellow snow
15. What's the most painful dental procedure you've had? rectal probe
16. What is out your back door? dog poop
17. Any plans for Friday night? lumber sandwich
18. Do you like what the ocean does to your hair? perennial flossing
19. Have you ever received one of those big tins of 3 different popcorns? Collapsible income
20. Have you ever been to a planetarium? Iowa sucks
21. Do you re-use towels after you shower? mildew allergy
22. Some things you are excited about? hot ass
23. What is your favorite flavor of JELLO? monkey brains
24. Describe your keychain(s)? fallow exterior
25. Where do you keep your change? never change
26. When was the last time you spoke in front of a large group of people? seventeen seventy-two
27. What kind of winter coat do you own? large mammoth
28. What was the weather like on your graduation day? spelunking turkey
29. Do you sleep with the door to your room open or closed? indeed, yes.
Yeah, so I went kinda random.