crankyI've had to take a harsh look at parts of my life this last weekend, and discovered that some parts of my life that I thought were doing okay were not. And that part of why they weren't doing okay was because of my inability to perform to someone else's expectations.
So suddenly I have "performance issues". And that makes me cranky.
Will I get over it? Probably. But at this point, it has changed some characteristics of a certain interpersonal relationship for the worse, and a recovery does not seem particularly imminent.
I know it's my own problem. Solving it isn't something that I can do quickly, and it may not be possible at all. And it will take a tremendous amount of work and require a long-term change in my lifestyle.
Or I could be more self-centered and say that I don't feel like responding to the expectations of others. I have my own expectations of myself, and really, if I had expectations of others in the same way, I would get disappointed a lot.
So today I feel like being bitter and cranky. Fuck off.