Yes, it was my own challenge. Yes, there is no particular consequence from walking away from it, and I could make a bundle of excuses, but the net result is that I failed my own challenge.
Reality is that I was unprepared to take on my own challenge in just about every way. I don't have the space clean enough to shoot. I don't have the props and set decorations to do what I wanted to do. I don't have the lighting to do what I wanted to do. And the final straw was that I don't know my own software well enough to do what I wanted to do.
I spent some time last night trying to create an effect with some footage that I had shot a few weeks back. Not only did I not know how to do it, I couldn't even get started. That's a strong indicator that I need to get to know the software better so it doesn't get in the way of what I'm doing.
Because of this, I ordered a set of training DVDs. It's self-paced training, so I can fit it into my schedule.
This puts the Big Broken Box™ back on the front burner. And really, it belongs there. There's a lot of work left to do that I can't just walk away from (without winning the lottery), and it's time to get back working on the beast.
So der April Film Challenge ist tod.
In its place... well, nothing, really. I'm figuring that once I get the DVD tutorials I'll start looking into what I can and can't do, and maybe I'll post something there if it's interesting. And the movie I had planned to shoot is still do-able sometime in the future. Maybe this fall if all goes well in the meantime, but I'm not putting any grapes in the basket.
This hurt. There's a whole lot of disappointment involved, and my self-confidence has taken a good hit.