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Somebody said something to me today. Someone who I trust and love. Something that hurt a lot. I know it wasn't meant to hurt like that, but it did. And it's going to affect my relationship with this person, and likely everyone else that I come into contact with for quite a while.
Regardless of what you think of me, I deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.


( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 7th, 2003 01:54 am (UTC)
It's strange when that happens, isn't it? Someone says something that maybe isn't meant in quite the way you take it, but it still hurts.
Dec. 7th, 2003 10:45 pm (UTC)
Well, she knew it was going to hurt, and that was part of the intent. However, she didn't know it would hurt as much as it did.
And part of the hurt is mine. I own the madness that makes me so vulnerable in that particular area, and it is perhaps my biggest weakness. It's also something that I rarely share with others because I am so vulnerable there, but this is someone that I trust and now that has changed somewhat.
And really, that's not good. Not good at all.
Dec. 7th, 2003 08:22 am (UTC)
Does s/he know?
Dec. 7th, 2003 10:51 pm (UTC)
Oh, yes.
It's odd how I rarely have arguments. Most often it's because I'm right, but in cases of opinion, I usually can either see the other person's point and provide them with validation that I'm listening to them, or I realize that they are completely sociopathic and I just back away slowly.
This wasn't a disagreement. This was a statement of purpose. It wasn't even a discussion.
Dec. 7th, 2003 01:42 pm (UTC)
sorry your feelings are hurt
I do not have a journal, yet have gotten in the habit of reading others. I have been enjoying yours for a while now, long enough to travel with you to tennessee, where I live.
It troubles me to know that someone has wounded your feelings.
You have friends here who care, I am one of them,
Dec. 7th, 2003 11:06 pm (UTC)
Re: sorry your feelings are hurt
Thanks for the good wishes.
It was something that was partly meant to be motivational, because this person wants to change something about me that she doesn't like. Or more realistically, she wants to make me want to change this thing she doesn't like, and she's running out of patience.
The trouble is that it's not something that I can change right away, if at all. And it's also part of an issue that we've had pretty much since we've been friends.
It is something that I can work on. I can make an effort to change, but there is also the issue of resentment that she has tried to force the change that is tainting our relationship, and I don't know how to let that go.

BTW, I thought that Tennessee was really pretty, or at least the part I got to see. I don't know yet if I'm going back, but if I do, I'd like to spend some time in the Smoky Mountains.
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )

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