Imagination is a wonderful thing.
Right now, I am on a tropical sandy beach with a light breeze blowing, and the gentle sounds of the ocean surf lulling me into a sense of well-being. I am not in an office cube with all sorts of yelling going on in the cube next to me.
ass-kicking coder night last night. Almost 13 hours straight, managed to get one part of the code functioning. Enough where I can show the suits something pretty on the screen. Today is more coding, trying to get the next part going, even though I'm forcing the box to think something's there when it's not. It's not well designed for fake-outs.
I am intrigued by the personas that we put forth online.
Certainly nobody really thinks that what we see online actually represents the person we are reading about, any more than an artist's sketch actually represents the person being sketched. It's part of the reason that I use the 'Park icons for pictures-- they are cartoons, sketches that kinda show me, but really don't.
But at the same time, we like to represent ourselves in something of a good light. I know I want people to like me, so I try and write stuff that's in some way entertaining and funny, or thought-provoking, or sometimes just plain silly. I also take to bouts of creative writing that may sometimes be dark and disturbing because I'm in the mood to write something dark and disturbing. I don't write about everything that happens in my life, because a lot of it is just plain boring. And some of it is just plain nobody's business but mine.
Mostly, I try and talk about how I feel about stuff, because I've had a hard time understanding feelings, and if I try to put them to words, I can understand them better myself. I find it rather difficult, because feelings are not entirely encapsulated by words-- it's like the words are sketchy representations of the feelings-- and often times they are inadequate to the task.
But still, they can do some wonderful things.
And then there are the people who show pictures. Tiny snapshots of their lives. Again, an artist's representation, but of a different sort. Some are day-to-day events. Some are artistic renderings. Some are just weird shit. But in each case, they place a little bit more about the person, or at least what they want you to see.
Of course, there's a flipside to that. Because I'm aware of that, I tend to not hold back, and talk about some things which might be offensive to some. And I'm really okay with that. Because if you are offended by what I talk about, you would probably be offended by my personality as well. I don't want to be nice to everyone, or socially acceptable in all situations.
It's like walking around the house naked. It's my house, and if I want to do it, then I'm gonna do it. If you happen to look in and see me and your eyes are burned out because of it, well...
And really, I haven't had any complaints. A little teasing now and then, which I cherish like the memory of high-school snuggies, but nobody has said anything to me that implies that I'm too shocking, or too gross, or too whatever. So I think I'm doing okay. And after spending time pulling up random links, I can say that there are a lot of people out there that are much farther out than I am.
I have thought about opening up to questions, much like I have seen others do. And now that I have access to the bells & whistles, I may do that. It's a little scary because it's possible that I may get asked a question that may cross the safe boundary that I have set up for myself, but at the same time, I can't think of a question that would actually cross that boundary. And maybe if one did, it would be good for me.
So let me turn that around for a minute: what question do you feel would be crossing your personal on-line boundary? Something that might make you feel uncomfortable answering, and why does it make you uncomfortable?
Talk amongst yourselves. I'm all verklempt.
Well, I managed to kill off two more major bugsets today, and I now have 3 of the 4 viewers working properly, or at least seeming to. Because the data is pretty much random and there are very few accurate conversions in place, the results are meaningless, but they move the dials and it all looks pretty.
One of them is still bugging the shit out of me. It crashes in a totally weird place, and it's the same place that works properly 99% of the time. And it's not in a connected system. It's like if you have a jar on a shelf in your basement with the label turned sideways, your TV doesn't work.
But on a good note, I'm done a tad bit early, which means a bit more hot-tub/relaxin' time. Which I like. Duh.
Of course, I sit here writing in my livejournal. Why?
Because I care. :)
Silly me, I added some cayenne pepper to the snack mix. You gotta love a spice that comes with a warning label to avoid contact with eyes and skin. I now need to buy more diet Coke. And maybe find a new book. I just had to give up on "Always a Thief". It is so bad. I'm halfway through the book. It's supposedly about an international jewel thief, but so far the entire thing has been about the lady cop who is falling for the rogue against her better judgement. The entire book. It's not even a good romance novel. Gah.
Although I do have an unread copy of "Miss Wyoming" in the bottom of my bag, and Douglas Coupland is usually a pretty good read.
BTW, I finished Dreamcatcher. I liked the book. Now to see the movie.
And I found out Owatonna does indeed have a movie theater. In a mall. 6 screens. Not planning on going. Also a bowling alley. May go there, but probably not. The hot tub beckons, with its bubbly siren song...