July 5th, 2006

insane

(no subject)

Today I crashed. Woke up briefly and futzed around, then crashed back to horizontal until the middle of the afternoon. Forced myself back on the bike for a full 45 minutes, didn't think I'd make it, but I think the rigor mortis broke after the first 15 minutes or so.

Angsty.

Gotta pay some bills.
insane

(no subject)

So yeah-- supposed to be vacation. I just took a first swat at cleaning the kitchen, took out a lot of trash, paid a bunch of bills. There are some I didn't pay, simply because I don't have the money.

Money sucks. Or rather not having enough money sucks. Refi is going through another delay because the mortgage company's format for the mortgage payment history is apparently so convoluted that the loan fluffers can't understand it. My guess is that I am doomed.

I have a feeling that I've been trying to pin down, like I haven't been doing enough. I think it's probably an artifact of having been doing so bloody much for so long and suddenly having the lull where all of the stuff that I've been putting off has caught up and now it all needs to happen. Or perhaps it's the anxiety creeping back into my life.

Eye on it keeping.
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