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1. My ex... lives in Missouri now. (See, a nice, safe, gentle answer.)

2. Maybe I should... take a shower. (Hints that perhaps I'm starting to smell a little ripe.)

3. I love... making cool shit. (Again, no real surprise there. Maybe boring.)

4. People would say that I'm... easy, but they'd be wrong. (Whaa... some sort of judgement here? Hey, this could get interesting...)

5. I don't understand why... I'm ejected so easily. (What does he mean by that?)

6. When I wake up in the morning... sometimes it's afternoon. (Oh. Ha. No job, late nights.)

7. I lost my... virginity. (What, no details? COME ON MAN, we want DIRT!)

8. Life is full of... sound and fury, signifying nothing. (A Shakespeare riff? Lame.)

9. My past... is pretty shadowed. (Again, no details. Who cares?)

10. I get annoyed... by asshats. (Don't we all.)

11. Parties are/were... better when they're small. (Eh, okay.)

12. I wish... I was completely independently wealthy. (Well, that's selfish then, innit?)

13. Dogs... love me. (Because you smell like meat?)

14. Cats... often love me. (Wow, dude, I really don't want to know what you smell like. Take a shower.)

15. Tomorrow is... always in the future. (Lame, but I'll give you a break on this one. That's a lame leader.)

16. I have low tolerance for... alcohol. (Okay, that could be fun.)

17. If I had a million dollars... I'd buy your love. (A SONG LYRIC? Jeez dude, stop wasting my fucking time!)

18. I'm totally terrified... so rarely as to be functionally never. (Not afraid of anything? Yeah, right.)

19. My spouse... doesn't exist. (Meh. Not much to say on this one.)

20. My life... has its challenges. (Yawn.)

21. Where the hell... am I going to come up with money? (Get a job, you bum!)

22. I can't... touch my tongue to my forehead. (Fucker. You made me try it. Fucker.)

23. Nobody should... have to fight to survive. (Really? I can think of a few.)

24. There once was a... marmot in a big broken box. (Okay, I'd like to hear more...)

25. If you woke up next to me, I'd... probably have had one hell of a party. (SO have the party already.)

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April 2012


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