Barb made a snappy analysis tonight. Our lives are really quite good, except for having no money (or negative money), and that all the stress in our lives is directly tied to money. We should be independently wealthy.
I don't know why that was such a revelation for me, but it rings pretty damn true.
I'm trying to get my frame of reference back. There was once a time that I felt like I knew where I was going with my life, what I was doing, and that everything was sort of coming together, like a river flowing to a destination.
I've lost that.
I feel lost, directionless. I feel like I'm out of control of my own destiny. I feel like I should be doing something to make my life better. Intellectually I realize that things are out of my control, but the feeling is there.
I've been wondering if I should take some of my time and learn new technologies-- brush up on COM and ATL, Java and XML-- but really just learning it doesn't provide any experience, and that's what really counts in a job-frame.
So if I can calm myself enough to collect my scattered energy together and focus on some personal projects, perhaps I can instill in myself some personal growth.
Sounds good, doesn't it?
Mira Sorvino is a cutie. And a geek.