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Sorry to disappoint.

Confessional. Things that have been on my mind lately.


1.) No, I am not actually insane or psychotic. I'm actually quite mentally healthy, though I live in my head a great deal and I fret. A lot.

2.) No, I don't have demons that live in my head and talk to me. That is pure artistic license. I use the analogy to describe things like self-doubt and the frenzy of introspection that comes with fretting. If you've ever not been able to sleep because your head was whirling like a tornado, you know exactly what I mean.

3.) Yes, I've done drugs. Not all of them, but more than a couple. There was a time when I went beyond "casual" use and was probably in the "professional" category. Reagan was president, so I blame him. These days I'm pretty clean. Boringly so.

4.) I like a lot of things about myself. Not everything, but for the most part I'm okay with who I am and what I've become. I wish I had a better body, but I don't. I'm pretty strong, but not so good on endurance. It's better than it was, so I have improved.

5.) I hate going to doctors.

6.) I get really uncomfortable at weddings and funerals.

7.) I have a great interest in the "occult"; big surprise there. I'm kind of on the Fox Mulder train: I want to believe, but I need evidence. I also do Tarot card readings, though not nearly enough to be fully conversant. I have a great love of the supernatural in the wide sense: I've had enough experiences that lead me to believe that there's more out there.
Bear in mind that I also put religious studies in the "occult" category.

8.) I am a synaesthete. I get sensory crossover. Things like my sense of taste also has color, shape, and texture. This also makes music a phenomenal experience at times.

9.) This may make sense only to musicians, but I'm most comfortable living in E minor, with D minor running a close second.

10.) I have had experiences which qualify as "paranormal". Among these have been prescient dreams (of a really useless variety), being able to "read" moods (and sometimes images), and occasionally hands-on healing. None of these things happens with enough regularity to be reliable, though I stay away from large crowds (like the Mall of America) because of the intensity of all those people.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
alcippe
Oct. 12th, 2005 06:37 pm (UTC)
2. I love it when you talk to your inner demons. You express in words so many of the things I think about but have never said or written.

3. Me too. And like you I'm boringly clean now, too. But it's much healthier and I tend to have more money and be more productive.

6. I sort of like going to doctors. But in a sick, perverted sort of way. Dentists, too. I enjoy the pain I think. I enjoy the "ordeal" and I like the idea that they can "make me better".

7. I have always loved the occult. I've often tried to learn to read cards, but have never been able to "connect" with a deck - I always get such obviously wrong readings that it becomes discouraging. I have a pendulum and love it dearly - I never get a wrong reading. I don't know why I can connect so well with a pendulum and not a deck of cards. To each his own, I suppose. But I'm like you in that I'm always searching for the proof, for the truth. It's there, I know it's got to be there.. but I just want to SEE it and know for sure.

9. I live almost exclusively in D minor with some rare, brief excursions into G major.

10. I live almost exclusively by my intuition. That is, almost all my decisions have been based on my gut instincts rather than any real rationality. So far so good... it's sort of amazing!

Thanks for sharing. Your mind is fun.
magicmarmot
Oct. 12th, 2005 06:47 pm (UTC)
Thanks for sharing. Your mind is fun.

Thanks for playing. It's like a sandbox for the weird. :)
pied_piper70
Oct. 12th, 2005 06:41 pm (UTC)
Reagan was president, so I blame him.

You know, if you're going to base your drug use on the Administration, you'd even have more license to be doing drugs NOW...

This may make sense only to musicians, but I'm most comfortable living in E minor, with D minor running a close second.

Well, they say D minor is the saddest chord...which means you're comfortable being almost sad but not truly sad...I guess that's a good thing...

My favorite is chord is either G (modified as E minor 7 with G in the bass) or Fmajor7...depends on the day...I'm sure you really wanted to know that...
magicmarmot
Oct. 12th, 2005 06:49 pm (UTC)
Major keys have never really turned my emocrank. 7ths always make me feel tense for some reason, like they're twisted up wrong, or somehow false.
inked2x
Oct. 12th, 2005 09:57 pm (UTC)
Probably TMI from me but what the hell ....

5.)Me too!

7.)I also have an interest in this. I used to read tarot cards but I quit after too many weird things began to happen.

8.)Very cool!

10.)Weird. I also have had prescient dreams and being able to "read" moods and people (to the extent that I can tell childhood traumas in people I do not know.) Not many people know that about me.

Very interesting post.
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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