Tom Ramcigam (magicmarmot) wrote,
Tom Ramcigam

Spirituality has never really been rampant in my life. I was raised as a Lutheran until I was given the freedom to exit the fold which I did ASAP. Nothing to do with despising religion really, it was more that my experiences with the church had nothing to do with spirituality or answering questions about life and the relationship to the Great Beyond; it was all about stuffy shirts and rules and walls and fences and behavior modification. There was no spirit. There was coffee and coffee cake and hot dishes and snide hypocricy.

As I grew, I came to various parts of my life that needed definition, that needed knowledge and a framework with which to express that knowledge. College was good for that. Most of my spiritual exploration came out of college and a mixture of good drugs and bad women (well, bad for me) and death.

I suppose as far as major religions go, I'm the most familiar with new-testament christianity lite. I never handled snakes, never learned latin, don't let rats drink milk or stick needles through my skin. I generally don't believe in the literality of the OT or the NT, but take them as parables.

This has allowed me to question and search and find other things.

Some things that I have found are counter to my nice organized logical world. There are things that I believe bend around the corners of my precisely Newtonian model, that break the rules that I take for granted. About these things I have ambiguity in my world view. I remain skeptical but open to experience.

Lately I have hidden from my sense of spirituality, probably for the last several years. Part of that was the derision that I received when my spiritual sense was at odds with others. I learned to hide my spirit, to stuff it inside and ignore it.

I need to give it some room to grow. And that means time and space, neither of which I really have in abundanza right now.

Something to think about.

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